My first competion is in May in Philidelphia. Well... My partner sorta... sucks... I try to follow but it's hard. His mom is the teacher and all he does is complains and talk back. My teacher won't let me switch to another partner. I want to do this but learning the steps and my partner is hard.... Aww I need help

Wow, all I can say is that partnerships can be really difficult at times. Basically you need to weigh the risks: you could quit dancing with this guy and risk taking a really really long time to find a new partner -- and possibly not even being able to find one as good as him -- or you can get out of a situation that is making you feel badly. Despite what your teacher may say, you're a free person and can make your own decisions and if you really can't stand the partnership you can quit.

Of course, if you do that, the teacher might make it difficult for you to find a new partner. That would be a shame but it's a possibility.

Is there someone in your area who you look up to and who knows the dancers in your area that you can talk to? It seems like you could use some advice from someone like that.

Hi Kawaii
Laura's suggestion of finding someone to talk to - expecially if it's an experienced dancer - is a good one.
I'm an older dancer, so my experience and viewpoint may be slightly different, but two important points i would make are:
1)A good working partnership in dancing is absolutely essential(even more so than in other partnering sports, since your 'contact' is so close) and you must be able to work together as a team in a seamless way. From what you've said, this seems unlikely in your case.
2)There's a lot of hard work ahead and if you don't enjoy it - what's the point?? Dancing - competition dancing even - ultimately must be a pleasure for you, otherwise it won't be a pleasure for anyone.

but only you can decide (with the help of someone you trust and look up to, as Laura suggested). Speak openly with your teacher, that you don't think you can get on with your partner. Good luck in your dancing.

To play devil's advocate, I wonder what he thinks of you? Giving him the benefit of the doubt, he could be in an even worse situation, loving to dance but feeling like his mother/teacher and partner think he is not good enough. I'm sure he knows you think he "sucks" and if he argues with his mom on the dance floor, they probably argue more at home as well.

I am speaking from experience that it is more difficult to teach or learn from a family member than it is a complete stranger.

Before you chuck him, why don't you informally get together with him outside of practice. Tell him you are excited, but stressed. Ask him what he is feeling. Maybe you will see another side of him. Hopefully, he will feel more "understood" and will not rebel by acting so immaturely at lessons.

He could have a low self esteem, which seems obnoxious, but is very cureable.

Can you have an outside coach work with you? A fresh set of eyes (outside of the family) my be beneficial.

I met up with my dance teacher and she told me she wanted to pair me off with someone better from the start. And now another problem my partner keeps getting sick.

edit- he said so himself that he's using me to get himself an ipod shuffle... I swear i will hurt him

What a shame, it sounds like his mom is bribing him to dance and that he doesn't really want to.

Try not to take what is going on around you personally -- you're basically stuck in the middle of a power struggle between the mother and her son. I hope you can find someone in your area who can give you some advice and help you to find another teacher and another partner, if possible.

IF you are doing international style dances, perhaps you're better off becoming a better dancer by yourself. International style is universal so anyone can dance with anyone else no matter what level their at. Look for another teacher who's not so self centered.

kawaiidancer,

I'm competing in May, too, in Dallas. It has made all the difference for my past competitions and exhibitions that I have that connection and understanding with my dance partner.

I'd drop that partner like a rock! Trying to get proper technique is hard enough--let alone passion and style. The times that I've allowed any negative energy (from within or from without) into my dancing is when I experienced the lowest performance.

Conversely positive emotion has taken me to the heights of some my very best dancing--and when it counted, such as in competitions!

Good luck in both finding a partner that fits you and in all your future dance endeavors. Yours is a tough predicament, but you'll see it through...

Ray Sison
DanceMakers of Texas
Fort Worth, Texas