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Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by phantomsbeauty1890
1/31/2005  12:26:00 PM
I do take in swing dancing class,at my high school I am on the board of the swing dancing club. thank you.
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by phantomsbeauty1890
1/31/2005  12:29:00 PM
Wow,I didn't expect so many replies,thank you very much. If anyone has any advice at anytime please share it with me. Also to let people know what I have:Nager Syndrome but a very mild form of it. Thank you
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by operabob
1/31/2005  12:52:00 PM
p,

Wow,I didn't expect so many replies,thank you very much.

You're very welcome and a big thank you to all the others who you noticed took the time to answer. I think it proves my point that there are a lot of good people out there. Unfortunately, it's the jerks that always get noticed.

Just to add to the idea that we always take rejection personally, as our own fault.

I have a condition called "reflex sympathetic dystrophy" in my arms. I have it under control mostly now but it flares up once in awhile and can be very painful in my arms and hands.

I remember a woman in a dance class walking up to me once and giving me total hell because I didn't switch partners with the single ladies in the class. Truth was my wife is aware of my condition and we danced with that in mind. The other women in the class would not have been aware of it and could have made the pain worse.

The woman who came up to my had taken my not switching personally. I'm sure if she knew the truth it would have been different.

OB
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by me
8/4/2005  4:36:00 PM
I'm not a guy but i have to say one thing: If the guy dosen't like you for whats inside then he is no goo for oyu
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by phantomsbeauty1890
8/4/2005  11:00:00 PM
I agree...and I did find a guy who thinks I'm beautiful no matter what I look like.
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by Another Guy
8/14/2005  1:49:00 PM
Over the years, I've realized that a CHARMING and CONFIDENT PRESENCE rather than physical endowment is what makes a person attractive.

Those with such a presence have developed an inner confidence founded upon the acceptance of their faults and the celebration of their gifts.

How you ask a lady has more to do than what you look like. The confident eye contact, the assured manner that tells her: here's a guy I SHOULD dance with.

Never BEG for a dance--that is, don't get into the mindset of being so sure she will say no that you feel you have to get down on your knees just for a dance (unless of course you've developed such a charming personality--in which case, I say, go for it :). Rather, ask for the honor to dance a wonderful song with her.

Remember, timidity is a learned habit. So is confidence and boldness--have a lot of the first, and use the second sparingly.

Regards.
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by Another Guy
8/14/2005  1:53:00 PM
PS
I was speaking as a guy--in my previous post. But the same principles apply to ladies.

It's your presence on the dance floor, and your charm that carries the day. However badly you dance...
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by Anonymous
8/15/2005  11:28:00 AM
Looks do matter whether people choose to admit so or not. More than likely a lead would choose to dance with someone they found to be "attractive" over someone they might think to be a little less than, unless the non-preffered partner happens to be one heck of a follow.
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by Over the hill
10/10/2005  5:02:00 AM
Phantomsbeauty1890. Learn your steps well. I have found that if you can perform well finding someone to dance with you will not be a problem. I am 75 . I was at a club , very crowded. Lots of people dancing. It was mainly Jive and Rock and Roll. I was alone and had not got out of my chair or been on the floor. Coming straight in my direction was a absolutely gorgeouse young lady who would only be in her twenties. I took a quick look behind me to see who else was around. She was still heading in my direction with a very pleasant smile on her face. Would you like to jive with me she said. I wondered how she could possibly know that i could Jive. So as usual i led her into a Fallaway Rock Change of Places and so on just to see what she could do before doing trying anything spectacular. After a while she said, you don't remember me do you. No, but i'm sure i should. You taught me how to jive when i was fifteen that was over ten years ago. As i said before become accomplished with your steps and your problems will disappear. Best of luck.
Re: Is it my looks? A guy's opinion
Posted by NoSugarCoatHere
6/14/2006  4:33:00 PM
In life, sure looks matter. It gets you in clubs faster, more dates, people opening doors for you if you're female,...you all know. But, it does not get you very far and it's ephemeral. Sure it might get you more dates, but if there's no connection or if he's interested only in your looks, your relationship is going nowhere. Sure it might land you a job interview, but unless it's a job at a strip club, you'd probably not get the job if you don't have skills...Even good looking people have problems. There'll always be someone else prettier and younger. Lucky for us guys, we get more distinqushed as we age. Society is so screwed up.

To answer your question, I do notice a girl's look, but it doesn't stop me from asking her to dance regardless. However, what will determine whether if I'll ask her to dance again is how well she dances with me, whether or not she enjoys dancing with me, and her hygien.

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