I have a visting male dance coach that's helping me with Samba, Jive, Cha, and Rumba. I already dance with my Pro Am female teacher that works with me on latin. I just thought that I would take about 2 or 3 lessons per dance to just get him to refine what I am doing not be a permanent coach.

I wanted him to take each syllabus that I am interested in using in competition and help me with the technique. He is trying to spend lots of time on feeling the lady's balance, center, feet and etc. Lot's of details on leading correctly--this is ok but not what I wanted to focus on entirely. I get the feeling I am being put on some type of revolving plan since he is now teaching in my area every weekend and sets up classes weekly. He made one comment that made me cringe--"if you learn to lead like me or this the ladies will be all over you."

I am now starting to take more control of my lessons and looking at him as a short term fixer. I have heard that you can better mileage out of a teacher if he is hired for a specific thing for a specific amount of time. For example,
I want him to work on my Samba, refine my bota fogos, volta's, PP runs, cruzado locks, and help me link a routine together for competition--and not go off into infinity with art of leading.

Have any of you had problems keeping a teacher on your goals and not his--any ideas and advice.

I think he's got a point. The better you can lead your lady, the better she will look. The better she looks, the better you look. Latin is often described as "the lady's the picture, the man's the frame." If you compete pro-am, you may not be as aware of the need to lead well in competition, because pros can compensate and still look good. But the judges do know if you are leading or not.

Personally, when I hire a coach that I respect, I'm hiring his expertise to know what will most improve my dancing. So we work on what he decides is the most fundamental issue. In my experience, that's the best way to get the best out of a coach. And it's usually something pretty basic that we end up working on.

It does sometimes happen that a coach will have a hobby-horse or a recent insight s/he wants to emphasize regardless of the student. But if you feel that is happening, maybe it's not the right coach.

Maybe it would help if you were to define what you want more specifically. What do you think is wrong with how you do those steps? Is it footwork, hip action, or what? If you can identify that and ask him to work on that issue, you might have more luck.

I took 3 years worth of lesson twice a week from a pro that wouldn't let me control the lesson. He was good enough for me to allow this, but I got sick of him totally controlling a lesson like some type of dictator. He helped me, but wasted lots of lesson time. I can practice technique on my own and not during a lesson. I have been totally planning my lessons since, but do ask for input from my teacher.

On the leading stuff, I have two well balanced lady's that I can lead pretty well, not perfectly, but good enough.
This teacher appears to want me to be a great leader--like him for all the ladies that I dance with socially. Thanks, but no thanks--this is not my goal. The same teacher is going very slow with some other students too. I am afraid that he is used to teaching Pro Am ladies and having total control and doing things very slowly and extending lessons. What I want is a very efficient teacher--no jokes, no cell phone calls, no interruptions, and give me 100% during the lesson in relation to the well defined goals that I have and will reinforce again with him during the next lesson.

Then I guess you're going to have to find a coach who is willing to let students call the shots.

Clearly, we have very different ideas of what we want from coaches. But I don't understand how he will "refine your bota fogas," etc. without focusing on technique.