Zoinks! See what I get for not familiarizing myself with this forum's layout. I'm a UBBcode snob, and it's like learning Argentine Tango after three years of Foxtrot!

At the risk of losing any respect you may have had for me and my opinions, let me say this.
I am one of those ladies who... (wait for it) dance pro-am. Whoa, what a weight off my chest.
Why? Can't find an amateur partner. My husband has no interest and no time. And, most importantly, I love it.
I have no problem dancing socially with my husband and other men. I do not compare them to the pro I dance with. For me personally, I dance with a pro who does everything in his power to keep the costs down. He does not charge me to dance with him at comps. He does not charge me for transportation costs if I don't travel with him. There are no expensive meals, no extras.
Everyone has commented on what a better dancer I have become since starting with him. My following skills are much better so is my technique much better as well. I have read and heard all the horror stories about pro-am and i was leery at first. It is not ideal, I grant you. Right now it is the only option available.

I wonder about the experiences of (amateur) men dancing pro-am. They must be a far rarer breed.

nigelwee i am a man that dances pro am and at the age of 27 in the USA it is nearly impossible to find a partner at my age level who is not a pro or who has no other life and can dedicate the time others that criticize pro am seem to expect from everyone who dances. so for someone who waited until their twenties to start and who will probably never be able to compete against the pros who started at the age of five or even seventeen, pro am is the only truly viable solution. the other plus is at any social event from wedding to dinner dance to fund raising benefit my lead is strong enough that i do not need my partner their to dance very well. i attribute that to my dancing with a professional she must push me to be constantly better or lose me as a student. as to the supposed high cost comparatively are our cost much worse than natives of other countries? i hear stories of lessons for ten dollars but what percentage is that of the weekly mean income for that nation? but really that is probably a topic for a new thread

I know quite a few people who would have a heart attack if they read this paragraph.

There could be lawsuits.

As long as you can afford to do pro/am then you should enjoy your good fortune while it lasts. The important thing is that you're dancing, I guess.

jj

Thank you for your kind words. I was bracing myself for a classic JJ retort.
I have to say this about my pro. He is young and relatively inexperienced. A good dancer but by no means the best and he knows it. He is always getting coaching to improve himself. He gets nervous when competeing, as I do I, and sometimes makes mistakes. However, it is not brain surgery, no one's life hangs in the balance if we don't do well. I still come home with a plaque and a mug regardless of my performance!

As for amateur men doing pro-am, the ones I've met so far are all socially inept and emotionally dependent on their female pro. It must boost their fragile egos to be seen with a hot female pro. I don't know who they think they're fooling. I wouldn't take any of them on as an amateur partner...I'd rather pay the extra expense and stay pro-am.

Hmmmm.



Yes, having tried to do pro/am once myself, I would essentially agree with you. I would hasten to add the observation that many of them are frightened of their own shadows. Whatever improvements in self-esteem that the company of an attractive, athletic young woman may provide to men who are - let's say - permanently resident in Old Farthood, they pale in comparison to the relief they feel at not being responsible for anything that happens on the floor.

However, all emotions are eventually incinerated in the heat of anger when the poor sap sits down and figures out what it cost him to be schlepped around a dance floor for three minutes by a pretty face with the brains of a small muffin.



jj

"Permanent resident in Old Farthood?" Hey, I resemble that remark!
And is there anybody who finds it easy to find a suitable partner? Especially those of us who live in Lower Nowhere.

Ok, I admit it too -- I am one of those lady pro-am dancers. Unlike Ladydance's pro, my pro is expensive, but he is worth it to me. He is an accomplished instructor and an excellent competitor. I dance with him because I wanted to raise the level of my dancing and I like to compete. My husband and I take lessons together, and we enjoy dancing together socially, but he has no interest in competing. Dancing for him is what golf is for me -- I do it because I enjoy playing the game with him and being social with others while we're on vacation, but he'll never get to me to enter a tournament. That's how he feels about our dancing.

My husband likes my dance instructor a lot, and would much rather have me dance with him than anyone else. He's comfortable with the arrangement, and we've worked out a deal on how much I compete. So, it works for me. If I were younger and could be more serious about dancing competitively, I might take a different tack. But for this stage in my life, dancing pro-am fits!

So far, both reponses fall into a very predictable category: those foks who dance pro/am because their natural partner does not share their love of dancing.

In both cases, their particular situations make pro/am advantageous.

As I've pointed out previously, there is a time and place for pro/am and it often works well for those who are in a position to take advantage of it.

I just want everyone to be aware that there are other choices.

jj