Really curious to know the end of the story.

Linda, you hit the nail on the head. Very well written and very true. I too am a dance instructor and share your feelings exaclty.

I'm so happy to see that I'm not the only one to fall for my dance teacher. I just started dancing, so I wasn't used to all the attention and didn't realize that it was all part of the dance experience. I really fell for it hard, and came to realize the hard way that all the attention was just a game. I really love dancing though, and am trying to get over my feelings. I also don't have options outside of the studio that I go to because I live on a small island with a not so big salsa community! Does anyone have suggestions for how to make yourself not have feelings for your dance partners? Or, how to recover after putting yourself out there and then getting rejected? It's quite embarrassing! I'm also curious to know how it went with you, sbrnsmith. I hope it was better than my experience!

VenusRose you take all those feelings you are getting and put them into your dance to tell a story. Just like you would if you were doing a play. Once the song ends so does THAT story. **BUT** you keep all of the feelings this provides that makes you feel beautiful and fierce. Use this as stepping stones to build your confidence and your dancing abilities.

Remember - these instructors are in the backroom practicing their "charm" skills with each other. Know if for what it is ~ use it and play off it to get what YOU need to make you a FIERCE dancer. It's trash talk you leave on the dance floor at the end of the day.

I am a pro male and am curious about what happened after this. I have had students, young and old "fall for me" and yes, it made it much easier to teach lessons to them, also to have them take trips with me. Those ones tend to listen better and do as I ask, so they are more easy to teach, no stress since they hang on every word and want our approval, what teacher doesn't want this? This is how you ladies will know, many pro teachers restrict or limit what subjects and information we give to clients, even if we are speaking more casually/relaxed, and spend more time, its only to get to know you better so that we can give you a better experience for your money, flirting is natural, you will see us do it with all ages and shapes, its important to our business to make ladies feel good, but of course it is more fun if you are young and talented. If other clients know the same info (where we are from, how we got here, some foods, places of travel, taste in music, or perhaps even shops we like) its only what we opt to disclose. Most of us won't talk about our loved ones using names, our parents,won't disclose places we like to frequent, or even our neighborhood or talk about past relationships unless we are using it in an anecdote (ie. I once dated this girl... Blah blah, so now I'll never wear old spice again!!!) usually the rule is simple, you don't make your bed where you eat.

I am a pro male and am curious about what happened after this. I have had students, young and old "fall for me" and yes, it made it much easier to teach lessons to them, also to have them take trips with me. Those ones tend to listen better and do as I ask, so they are more easy to teach, no stress since they hang on every word and want our approval, what teacher doesn't want this? This is how you ladies will know, many pro teachers restrict or limit what subjects and information we give to clients, even if we are speaking more casually/relaxed, and spend more time, its only to get to know you better so that we can give you a better experience for your money, flirting is natural, you will see us do it with all ages and shapes, its important to our business to make ladies feel good, but of course it is more fun if you are young and talented. If other clients know the same info (where we are from, how we got here, some foods, places of travel, taste in music, or perhaps even shops we like) its only what we opt to disclose. Most of us won't talk about our loved ones using names, our parents,won't disclose places we like to frequent, or even our neighborhood or talk about past relationships unless we are using it in an anecdote (ie. I once dated this girl... Blah blah, so now I'll never wear old spice again!!!) usually the rule is simple, you don't make your bed where you eat.

I also think VenusRose's question is very important. If someone would reply in a new chain as not to derail this one, but both I would follow avidly as someone who is trying to get into dance and thinking of one day trying pro.

Thanks for all of the info!

I started a new thread about this topic and called it "the emotional side of dance." I'm looking forward to getting your feedback!

Nice! But I wouldn't ask him out. Be patient and let him take that first step.

It would be so hilarious, therapeutic, informative and healthy for the both sides of dancing community to create awareness of all the cliche lines and behaviors that instructors with bad practices feed their students (at first, I thought they were just clumsy attempts to be polite). I do not know what female instructors say or do, but from collected comments of male instructors I may start with: "..you don't know what effect you have on men.."; "..I have had hundreds of students, but never connected with anyone like this.."; "..you are the most exciting woman I have ever met.."; and the crown of them all - "..oh! what are you doing to me.." Would be so wonderful, if people share other lines.