I have a related question that hopefully someone can help me with.

I love dancing and am fairly new to ballroom, but have experience performing and competing in other dance styles and feel comfortable exressing myself. Unfortunately I am feeling a little stress over a situation I would never experience in "stage dancing."

I enjoy adding styling into my dancing, and try to ask as many men to dance as possible at practice sessions/socials. I am disappointed to find that many men are not inhibited to try to take things to a personal level (asking for dates), which makes me feel uncomfortable. Personally, I am not at all flirtatious, and I have never had this problem in my career in sales where I interact with many clients each day (in general people treat me with respect as a professional).

I want to continue to practice so I can dance at my personal best (and have fun). What is the best way to exude that I am there to dance (not find dates) and would like to be treated more professionally?

I dress conservatively and do not drink at these events. I am currently single, so there is not a boyfriend/husband I can have pick me up or watch.

I appreciate any advice and suggestions!

Thanks

The best ways to avoid getting asked for
a date are to show up and dance exclusively
with a practice partner or practice on your
own, and don't dance with or talk to people
who don't know you (unless you know that they
aren't single). Also, go to events that
are described as "practices" and not "social
dances", or go to a studio during open floor
time and practice then.

Thanks, those are good points. I will take your advice.

I'll tell you 2 things:

1- You can find a partner in harmony with you or maybe ask a friend of yours to join the class with you.

2- Dance like nobody is watching you.

Actually the situation corrected itself.

Martin, I had to actually break out of my comfort zone and social circle when I began dancing more seriously and frequently. I realized I didn't want to just dance socially, I wanted to really practice and develop. This change can put you in a vulnerable position. I was in a new position and had to be a sponge and learn from others, however, I was not there to "meet people" socially like many other dancers. However I wasn't opposed to meeting new contacts to learn about dance and to network in general.

Basically, after a few months people got to know my reputation. A few of the more serious dancers took me under their wings. There were a few good dancers who did try to pursue a relationship, and basically being polite but somewhat standoffish cured that.

Plus, when my dancing improved it somehow changed the type of people who approach me.

I guess you can say I'm not "fresh meat" any more :)

Sorry, but it seems to me you're not cut out for ball room dancing. You need to loosen up, quit and/or get a life.

Dani
Anyone can ballroom dance. Im sorry , but people do not appreciate being told to 'quit and get a life'. All it takes is a little practice, and the attitude needed for the certain dance will come with time. Like others have said, it does not come immediatly. Keep working hard and it will come!

Yeah, dani with an "i",
you dont have to be completely out going to dance, you can be shy. Alot of great dancers i know are shy off the floor. The only reason they arent shy on the floor is because they have deen danceing long enough to be confident. Dont listen to this dani with an "i", you go out there and dance. With time you will over come your shyness and have great stylizations. Stylizations also come when your more comfortable with the moves. Also you dont have to do the exact stylizations your instructor may show you. If you think they are too sexy for you right now, tone 'em down a lil till your more comfortable, and soon youll be comeing up with your own. Oh yeah, dani with an "i", be nice.

wow, Dani. Maybe you CAN assess performance from an internet posting, but I think I'd rather listen to my instructor's assessment, my fun level, and the competition results ;)

I'm actually quite outgoing, but yeah, I can be a little intense and a bit of an overachiever. It just frustrated me at first that it wasn't like other dance styles or sports in the sense that random guys would always be asking "do you have a boyfriend?" "do you want to go for drinks after?" etc.

If anyone else doesn't want that and just wants to have fun dancing and practice - the guys there to pick up chicks go away after a while.

I disagree....just think that the men once used to be shy like you and now with EXPERIANCE AND TRYING they are like this. I do agree with crimson_tear....just dance and someday the latin rymth will hit ya and you won't be shy anymore