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| Originally posted by contracheck: Great stuff has been posted on this topic by a bunch of dancers - thanks to everyone  I read all with great interest and in an odd way was even comforted by what I read, really ! My pet peeve however I have not seen posted, so here it goes: In the part of the country where I live, a very nasty "monster" is alive and being continually "fed" in the entire (yes entire !) dance community ! There is this "exhausting surplus of bored women" crowding social dances and dance studio parties .. most of them cannot dance and are undesirably overweight >  ingenerally miserable with their life and nasty as can be  despite wads of money they carry around with them .. When somebody like me, 5'4/114 -- who cares about eating right and maintaining a healthy and proper weight level, is in excellent physical condition due to daily exercise and wears size FIVE dresses shows up, holy hell breaks lose Not "dirty" but POISENOUS looks hit me like darts from all directions, snide remarks like: "get the skinny little blonde girl a hamburger" (like, I am a VEGETARIAN ?!) or "she is on the make, lock up the men", sarcastic "oh are you a professional or just a show-off in dental floss", the list goes on and on I am NOT looking for pity here, but I am a good christian girl and thank the Lord EACH day for having gifted me with the abundance that He has, in this case, a natural talent and great love for dance, my spirit soars while dancing and I actually worship the Grantor w-i-t-h my dancing ... Trying to make friends with these women does NOT work, believe me, I have tried again and again and as the declared "enemy" spend alot of the time SITTING DOWN ! The men do not/or rarely ask me to dance and when they do, catch hell from the 'fat set' for it .. ergo: I no longer go dancing and stay home hoping to find a steady partner online .. Other "skinny" ladies I have spoken with encounter the very same thing !!! In that spirit, here is a message to all women who are OVERWEIGHT BY NEGLIGENCE and HATEFUL to folks like me: DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT other than relieving your miserable little selves by poisoning HEALTHY folks like me  JENNY CRAIG CENTERS ARE ALIVE AND WELL ALL AROUND THE COUNTRY !!! THE KEY IS: GET OF YOUR $&%^@ AND ONTO YOUR FEET !!!!!! Those who are offendened by this, guess what, I don't mind sharing being "offended" ... read 'em and weep !!!! Thank you for letting me air ... "Proud of being healthy inspite of it" Wow, that's so sad to hear that you have encountered that Contracheck! I've been very fortunate not to have encountered that myself (at least not visibly). What you see on the outside is indeed an indicator of what goes on within. The thing is, it CAN be helped and remedied with the right combination of personal desire, resolute action, and most importantly, surrounding oneself with people who will nurture and encourage you, not belittle you and put you down for wanting to be better (it's amazing how much of that goes around) Here's the thing, I'm not exactly rail thin myself, but I make it a point to stay physically active and really involve myself in life to its fullest. Dancing is a wonderful way to do that (it sure beats the tar out of watching TV, which is such a minimal thing in my life anyway)  The "monster" I have encountered up in these parts is the two-headed one of Criticalness and Snottiness", for instance, when someone's good and they let it go to their heads. Another variation is, for instance actually being refused a dance by someone because "You have too strong a lead" ?????!!!!!  (And all these years, I've been told that women tend to like a strong and decisive but not over-zealous lead) That's a new one on me! The thing I noticed in short order is that person RARELY, if ever, danced the whole night, that told me something right there! Contracheck, your honesty is nothing short of refreshing, and you were in no way offensive at all, just bluntly honest! Hoo Hooooo Hoo Hoooooooo |
| Originally posted by phil.samways:
Someone asked "why go to a social dance to dance with just one person?"
The answer is, to dance with that one person.
Everyone goes to dances for their own reasons. This is not in defense of the question, but in all the years I've been dancing I don't know of any couples who danced solely with each other. "Dancing is a contact sport; football is a hitting sport" - Vince Lombardi |
| Someone asked "why go to a social dance to dance with just one person?"
The answer is, to dance with that one person.
Everyone goes to dances for their own reasons. |
| > Originally posted by PhilOwl:
> We all have them in one form or another. Post
> yours here, from the sublime to the
> ridiculous!
>
> I'll lead the charge, mine would be:
>
> 1) People with bad hygene
I don't like this either, so I usually bring a couple of spare shirts.
> 2) People who constantly criticize you,
> constantly correct you and try to teach you
> while dancing, a HUGE no-no!! This is very
> demeaning and belittling.
I try not to do this, but sometimes my students ask for feedback at dances, so I try to say something constructive. Otherwise I only spontaneuosly "correct" people when they do something dangerous. I hope they take it as constructive...
> 3) A woman who won't let you lead
But that's part of the fun! Getting the follower to do what you want.
> 4) Snotty attitudes. Dancing is supposed to
> be FUN!!
If it's not fun, why do it? Get a grip, come to terms, loosen up, have fun!
> 5) At social dances, couples who have
> complete absolute disregard for others around
> them (exemplified for instance, by darting
> in between other couples showing off their
> competition moves that need a whole empty
> floor to pull off. That is just pure
> arrogance!)
I dislike this immensely as well. If you can't control your dancing enough to stop partway through some pattern or routine than you don't really know how to do it.
Bumping into people is rude, but sometimes happens. Check to see if everyone is OK before dancing away obliviously.
6) People who drag a partner or friend to a dance and expect them to have fun when they don't know what they are doing.
7) People who agree to be dragged somewhere, and then pout because they don't know what they are doing. Just try, have fun, move!
8) Couples who don't trade partners. Why go to a social dance if you are only going to dance with one person?
9) Dance organizers who advertise entrance only as a couple, and don't even suggest trading partners. What about all those people who want to dance but don't have a partner to dance with?
Kevin |
| Hello everyone.
I basically have two real pet peeve: hygiene and snobs.
I dance for the fun of it - life is too short. |
| PhilOwl:
It's amzing what irks us, and I'm sure . . . any response from a follower will be in contrast to what ever we can say . . . about pet peeves!
1. 'Ditto' on the bad hygene
2. 'Ditto' on the critics that are out there, especially the ones who are just sitting on their duffs and couldn't follow you if their life depended on it!
3. I don't mind a woman who can hi-jack me. I 'can' do the follower's stuff - to an extent!
But, what I've discovered about a follower who won't let you lead, is to lighten up on my lead until it's almost non-existant. They get the hint real quickly!
4. Under-dressed women who take my mind off of dancing. I'm no prude here and I love women, but it's difficult to lead if I have to keep my hands in my pockets!
5. 'Ditto' on the couples who think that they are the only couple on the floor. I've sustained a broken bone on the top of my foot because of a lady who thought a 'leg sweep' was a dance move and not a martial arts move!
6. Lastly, followers who are better than me that cannot come down to my level, even though I think I'm very good. There are 'some' dances that I haven't quite totally grasped yet! |
| I try not to do this, but sometimes my students ask for feedback at dances, so I try to say something constructive. Otherwise I only spontaneuosly "correct" people when they do something dangerous. I hope they take it as constructive... Kevin, that is a very healthy and gentlemanly thing to do. BRAVO!! Once in a great while (not real often though)I'll find myself having to correct a partner only if they are doing something that can be harmful (like excessive force, taking gigantic steps into the next state and throwing me off-balance). And just thought of my next pet peeve, a partner that holds onto you with a death-grip. At a recent swing dance I went to, I wound up dancing with this one woman whose fingernails were like talons on a hawk or a great horned owl, and I started to feel her digging in to my hands . I bemusedly said to myself later, "Was I dancing with a person or a bird-of-prey?" This one is pretty funny . At a swing dance one Christmas season, I danced with a woman who was just fabulous and a very sweet person to boot. Only thing was, she had these battery operated Christmas lights in her hair. Every time she would spin or twirl, I had to snap my head back to avoid getting smacked by these lights in her ponytail. I still laugh about it to this day! Hoo Hooooo Hoo Hoooooooo |
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