"He said ease off , and some more. In the end i was down to the count of about one. No more than that he said. That is all you need for a connection and sometimes only our thighs are touching. This means the lady must know her own steps, and as a man don't try to do the ladies steps for her. It looks and is heavy if you do."

Right idea, but wrong conclusion. It does not mean that the lady needs to know her own steps, only to haver reflexes for moving her own body and sensetivity to feel what the man is doing. If she were dancing her own steps, she would feel much heavier as she would never quite be coordinated with him.

I had that problem too. My coach gave me a few techniques that helped. I have only been taking private lessons for about 6 months as well.

1. My arms should feel bouyant, almost like they are floating on top of water.

2. The lifting of the arms should actually come from your back muscles, not necessarily the shoulders. That way your shoulders tend to stay relaxed. I imagine wings unfolding.

3. To keep my frame erect the center needs to be under control. With this part she told me to imagine that I am closing my rib cage together and pressing my belly button into my back.

4. Well, I'm not sure exactly how to say this, but...keep the bosoms up and out....This helped me more than anything with standing straight and tall.

5. I have to remember the narrow base, wide top theory and "stay in the man's hand". Basically the hand on my shoulder I should strive to stay in contact with. This keeps my body and head from dropping into the man's dance space.

I know this might sound silly, but I learn better with examples like this. They may not work for you if you don't have the same learning style and since I am a beginner, there may be other more advanced dancers with better advice.

Good Luck with your dancing.

Wannab10dance.I think you need some advice on the bosoms up and out. That will give you a small back and has a tendancy to pull the elbows out of that position which is elbows slightly in front of your body If you were doing Latin a New York that is a different situation. There you can lift them to the ceiling. If you go to the very excellent video clips on this site I would take a look at the poise in the Foxtrot Feather Step. Note the flexing of the knees and the drive off the standing foot right to the toe, and the solid frame of the man, where if you go to the Reverse Turn, both sides turn equally . Also on these moves the head stays in one position. Still worried about your chest. Man or lady must not push the chest foreward creating a small back.

Ha ha ha at lift them to the ceiling. Maybe when I go back to the cha cha I'll remember that it might help. Actually because of the way I was standing before, my teacher suggested this. It made it better for me. Only because that was a particularly weak area. My center tended to collapse and when she said to do that, it tightened everything up. She noticed that when I lifted my chest, everything attached to it lifted, including my back and luckily for me didn't include an arch. In many it would be too much, with me it was just enough to get me in a good dance position. Kind of like with my latin dancing. When I was learning my Rumba walks, I had a tendency for one foot to turn inward on my forward step. So she said try really hard to turn it out and that just made it straight. But, I'm glad you replied, I'm new to dancing and would hate to give bad advice. It can be difficult sometimes because people learn differently and what would work great for one, would be a disaster for another. Thank you for your input.

WannaB10dancer. It is intersting you brought up the turnout of the foot ,which should read feet.Unless you have been walking for years with one foot turned in for some reason, try this. Feet together. Both feet turned out to 45 degrees. If at any time your teacher says freeze, don't alter your foot position bring them together, they should still be at 45 degrees. This is A New York , Spot Turn or whatever. In a Rumba Walk as you come into that neutral position it will not be so noticable because of the high instep, but it is still there. Going foreward Rumba Walks. If you start with one foot behind the other, as you are supposed to. As long as you step across your body, from the front, hiding your rear leg, and keep you shoulders to the front, which i am sure you have been told. The turnout of the back foot will look after itself. I have been told it is as if you are going part way around a slight turn this keeps the thighs together. Which brings me to a story. Wally Laird who you have most likely heard of. Said to a lady pupil. If i see a gap between your thighs once more i will place my hand in that gap.She told us that from then on if Wally was around she walked cross legged. A good excercise to do regularly is ( we do it all the time)is to extend your hands in front finger tips level. Rumba Walks. Are the fingers still level or is one or the other now level with your palm. It shouldn't be. Another way is to cross your arms across your chest and keep them to the front. This helps the body to understand that it is the hips that are moving and not the top. This is what is meant by hip isolation.Most people on this site seem to be modern only. Its good to hear from a Latin person. Keep up the good work and as Karen Hardy said when asked how long should i keep doing Rumba Walks, she said forever.

Quickstep. Did you have the same English teacher has Don with your spelling of the forward (Foreward) walks?

Anonymous. As long as you understand , who cares. I'll promise not to do it again by writting a hundred lines of not foreward. Anyway don't you think it looks better that way.

OK, Don.

There is a word spelled foreward, but it's to do with an introduction to a book

Nearly there Phil. The word you are thinking about is ForeWORD. There is no such word in my dictionary or my Thesaurus of 'Foreward'. I'm sometime puzzled why they want to spell it this way. I remember not long ago someone querying the spelling who had English has a second language. All I can say is they may feel 'cool' about it. What ever that means.