My advice to you is to listen to Ellen! Her words helped me about a year ago. If you cannot get over your crush, you should seek another instructor. Simply put if he really was interested in you he would tell you. I know Ellen's words do not make you feel good, but it is difficult for you to think of it in a clear-headed fashion right now, so please listen to her.

I'm glad to know I helped. I do get a little blunt about this issue, but I know how seductive those crushy feelings can be and I'm trying to provide a reality check!

Ellen-- Thanks SO much for providing a reality check. It's funny how sometimes you get caught up in these things and start thinking they will lead to something more, when the reality is that acting upon your schoolgirl crush would only lead to a pretty awkward and uncomfortable situation for both teacher and student.

Like you said, hearing the truth-- that your instructor DOESN'T really have those feelings for you too, and that's it's all part of his job-- can be harsh at first, but then once you get over it you're grateful for the wisdom.

Thanks again for providing us all with rational thought!

idk if this helps or not but i have MANY years of acting training. I was always taught to never get involved with instructor or partner. Instead i was taught to develop chemistry with that person. You need chemistry to perform well. If you don't have it then it won't be as good as someone elses performance. So i develop chemistry with my instructor and ill joke around and laugh and all but in the end the student is doing it to enhance her performance to the audiance.. the instructor is joking and laughing to keep money in his pocket(most of the time) not to say that they don't consider you a friend and good person its just how it is.. the same would go with a partner.. develop chemistry but remeber not to take it too far and both have an understanding of what you need to do.. you need to perform well together. This was drilled into me since i was young.. it does help you for the future.. im 18 my instructor is 22.. i have chemistry with him but its a older brother younger sister relationship.. we joke around and all and i do consider him a great person but we are also serious and in the end our chemistry and the fact that we are close in age will make our routine great and impressive for our showcases.. he may have chemistry with his other students too so he doesn't lose them but its all to a point.. also to add my instructor is dating his old partner and i couldn't be more happy for him.. i know sometimes it can be hard but you get use to controlling the chemistry you have with an instructor/coach

I couldn't agree with all in this discussion. I've been dancing with my instructor for 8 months and I developed an attachment towards him. Like everyone, I got caught up in the harmless flirting and attention that I was receiving from him and paid for "X" amt of lessons so I can spend more time with him..all the while I'm in a long term relationship and he's engaged (I think) and sometimes you can't help but have all these feelings because dancing is a way of expressing emotions.

it's sometimes hard for me to act while I'm dancing because I've built this crush towards my instructor, but I remind myself everytime I walk on that dance floor that I have a wonderful man at home and that it's just dancing..he has to act that way because he's a professional and I'm just the student..I'll get over it..I joke and laugh with my instructor all the time to help with the akwardness at times..and it helps to find your crush..like the person before me said..it's just chemistry..if you channel that onto the dance floor it'll make your performance 10x more emotional...and passionate...just leave it on the dance floor.

**side note: It's more fun and challenging when you can't always have what you want... it's almost like a game..it helps get over the crushy feelings ;)**