Hi KC. I read your message with interest. I'm in the midst of severing a relationship with an instructor (he's leaving the country), and am finding it a painful experience for both of us.

This is the second time I've had to go through this, and this happened even though we both initially made an attempt to keep an emotional distance.

In the first case, my instructor was a very emotional guy and the experience was very intense, even though we only saw one another in the studio.

What can I say? Well, I've learned that my heart has room for more than one guy, even though there's no sexual relationship involved. In one case, the man is completely gay, and it gave me some insight into the strong emotional relationships that can form between gay men and hetero women. But it took a lot of confusion and angst to get there. i've made a couple of good friends, but the down side is the pain and emotional energy involved.

Your point about how this thing is handled is right on. You have to keep a perspective on it.