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Devistated
Posted by Robin Broadbent
2/11/2019  10:17:00 AM
My dance teacher of 5 1/2 years has decided to leave our studio. He has a great opportunity to own his own studio. I am besides myself. My teacher doesn't just teach dance patterns and shaping. He understands the mental and emotional aspect of dance. He knows how to help people make their dreams come true and how to use what is going on in one's life to benefit their dancing. I was never allowed to dance when I was growing up. Over these past years my dreams have come true and I have grown as a person in ways i never thought possible. I have achieved a freedom I never knew existed. At 56,my husband and I have a lot of years left for dance. But my teacher and I compete and perform together. We have been told frequently that we have great chemistry on the dance floor.There are more dreams I have and need his help with. Now, in 5 months he will be gone and I can not bear the thought of dancing without him. My secondary teacher is young and doesn't have the skills or knowledge to work with students like me. I have been told that a new teacher will be hired but so far, I haven't seen any teachers who can do what mine can do. I know that teachers can't base career choices on one student and I know that he is getting his dream, but I am losing mine and I simply do not know how to deal with this. Has anyone else had to stop dancing because of the loss of a teacher? If I keep dancing, I know I will see him at events and the thought of that is killing me. Before you ask, I am not in love with him. I love my husband very much. It is that my teacher,through dance has done more for me as a person than anyone I have ever known. Not only has he made my dreams come true,he has helped me with personal growth and confidence. I just do not know how I can go to the studio without him there or let anyone else reap the benefits of all that he has invested in me. He is moving out of town so following him is out of the question. I just do not know how I can go on dancing with our him as my teacher.
Re: Devistated
Posted by Ladydance
2/16/2019  6:53:00 PM
It is terribly hard when your instructor moves on but it happens all the time. How important is dancing to you? I manage a studio and see this happen often. Give the new guy a try, his methods will be different but think of the challenge. I am not saying this to be mean, but the chemistry you think you had was fake. I deal with many instructors every day, I know how they think and how they work - they talk to me about their students. They are all actors. I'm not saying he didn't like you but, honestly, it is his job to make you happy as well as teach you how to dance. If you truly love dancing then you should be able to carry on but I think you are far too emotionally invested in this illusion that there is no one else.
Re: Devistated
Posted by Robin Broadbent
2/25/2019  1:03:00 PM
Yes, I do know that teachers are paid to prey on our emotions and that students in general are just meat for the sausage grinder. I have worked with a number of teachers to know when one genuinely cares about a student's dancimg. Dancing is much more emotional and mental than I ever expected. After 5 years there is a connection genuine or not, it is one I will miss. We have been so comfortable with each other that we have gotten along great and been at each other's throats. This teacher have me a stability and comradery that I do not have in my personal life. This is what I will miss the most.
Re: Devistated
Posted by bocagirl
2/19/2019  11:58:00 PM
Ladydance gave a hard answer, but a very realistic and very good one. Try a new teacher - particularly one that pushes you hard. You'll be so focused on climbing to a new level of abilities, that the other emotional support aspects from your earlier teacher will be replaced by your own confidence and resilience.
Re: Devistated
Posted by Robin Broadbent
2/25/2019  1:09:00 PM
I haven't decided what I am going to do yet. I know that students in general are just meat for thesaurus grinder and teachers prey on emotion. I have worked with a number of teachers to know this to be true. This particular teacher and I have been through a lot over the past 5 years and is the one teacher that has pushed me harder than any other. He is one of the rare teachers that genuinely cares about his students and their dance experience. I have had other teachers who have moved and have not had trouble with them leaving. The experiences I have had over the past 5 years and the comradery we have had is what is making this such a hard transistion. sometimes the bar is set so high that it simply can't be reached by anyone else.
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