After alot of looking and searching I've realized sometimes you're better off without a partner. Of course that also means no dancing......

To Also Looking,

Someone one said that listening to someone complain is an act of appreciation.

Thank you for appreciating the situation. From what I hear from your situation, you have more reason to complain than I do.

And I think that just because someone is without a partner doesn't mean they are undesirable. It is hard to find a good match, especially with all the things there are to consider:

1. Body type match. Whether you like the way you look and move together.

2. Skill levels. If you are happy with each others skill level in dancing.

3. Interest in the type of dancing you want to do. It helps if you want to do the same types of things.

4. Practice availability. Can you get together and find a place to practice enough each week to accomplish your goals?

5. Compatibility. Do you learn well together? Do you practice well together? Do you perform well together? Do you like working with each other?

6. Connection. Is there enough of a connection and charisma between you to make the partnership work well? If you are doing Latin, for instance, you may want the sizzle. If you are doing Standard, you may want the elegance, etc.

7. Teachers and coaches. Do you agree on who to study with? Are you both willing to work with the same technique, coach, etc.

8. Financial issues. Do you agree on who pays for what.

9. Travel issues. Do you agree on where you are willing to travel for practice, coaching, performance, competitions, etc?

10. Partnership issues. Do each of you have the skills to work through problems that may come up.

11. Romance issues. If your partnership is also a romantic relationship, can you make that work. If it isn't, are the romantic partners for each of you supportive of your dancing partnership.

With all these things that go into making a good partnership work, it is no wonder it may take a while for people to find partners. Especially as you advance in skill level and your requirements are higher.

Dancing and loving it,

Karen

To Not as bad as the personals,

I know several male dancer friends who have told me that it is very difficult for them to find a partner, so you are not alone in that sentiment. Most of those men are Standard or Smooth dancers, however.

I wonder if it depends upon the dance category of partnership?

I dance International 10 dance and have found that it is easier to find partners who will do Standard or Smooth, but that there aren't as many male leaders who are in Latin. Also, since I am at the Novice/Pre Championship level, there are fewer dancers in general available. I am willing to consider dancing with someone at a lower level than I am, but it is quite an investment of time and so commitment is important.

There are so many issues for parnters to consider. For example, if dancing standard, then your body heights and leg length, etc, needs to match within a certain comfort range. If dancing Latin, many men are sensitive about dancing with woman who are not significantly shorter than they are.
Also, there is practice time available to consider. And so on...

I have been married and out of the dating scene for a while and frankly I would tend to agree with you that finding a dance partner has got to be easier than the personals. I have never used the personals, but have read them from time to time. And so many of my friends are single and tell me their stories. It is just not an easy thing.

Thank heavens for good friendships! I really do appreciate the good friends I have developed in the dance community.

Dancing and loving it,

Karen

To that not as bad as the personals guy,

You said:


She actually ended up doing Pro/Am, which does seem to suit her well.

As far as the couple we were watching, I think he was doing his job in making his partner look great! I was enjoying their dancing.

Dancing and loving it,

Karen

I had a good conversation this evening with one of the friends I dance with. He is at a Silver level in Latin and does want to progress to Open Gold, which is where I am.

We have decided to practice Latin a couple times a week until he gets up to my level. He has another partner who is a bit below his skill that he is competing with now, so I just encouraged him to continue to compete with her while he moves through syllabus. I think I will take the advice of a fellow amateur who said sometimes it is good to wait for a partner with good potential to develop their skill. Compatibility is very important to me and I do feel we are compatible. He has proven his dedication to dance over the past two years that I have known him.

I think other than listing on the websites, I am not going to actively look for a partner. I do tend to meet people on a regular basis as I am dancing 15 hours per week. I am not so intimidated today, thanks to the posts of all of you and for just being able to share a bit of temporary frustration and hear others stories.

I have another friend that is looking for a partner too. We may end up dancing with each other in Standard, but he hasn't had a chance to try out with anyone other than his last partner and me, so I encouraged him to do so. I have tried out with about 8 people, so I know that if he wants to dance with me, I would be interested in dancing with him. I will just be patient. I think that good things will come my way eventually.

I do have an excellent female lead to practice with who is at my level. We met at a competition and will be practicing together 3 times per month to keep our repetoire in shape and push the envelope a bit.

I think other than listing on the websites, I am not going to actively look for a partner. I do tend to meet people on a regular basis as I am dancing 15 hours per week. I am not so intimidated today about this "partner looking thing", thanks to the posts of all of you and for just being able to share a bit of temporary frustration.

Dancing and loving it,

Karen