I've been dancing salsa for 6 months and lately I've been hearing from guys I dance with at the socials that I seem scared to dance, that I need to feel the music and relax, and let go because I look mechanical. I have to admit that I feel a little tense when I social dance especially if I don't know what move is coming, so does anyone have any suggestion as to what I should do to just give in? It seems to me that based on the comments I'm supposed to feel vulnerable... is that what they mean? Thanks.....

I'm not sure if your question is relating to styling and the general enjoyment of the dance or if it's an issue of following someone's lead. If it's the former, it'll come in time as you get your basics and technique down cold and as you gain more confidence through practicing the same thing over and over. If it's the later, which I think is the case, it's an issue of learning to follow and an issue of connection with your partner. You are probably trying too hard to anticipate what moves he's going to put you through next. You're probably the type that also tries in group classes to learn the leading part so you could get an over-all picture of how the moves should go. That's perfectly fine, but in my experience, these ladies are too preoccupy with that and forget to learn how to feel the lead. My suggestion is during your next group class, just focus on your part and really try to FEEL the ques/leads. As a follower you don't need to memorize the patterns. That's the leader's job. Your part is to follow your partner's lead at all costs, even if he does the pattern in the wrong order. It's his fault. Don't try to correct him. Go with the flow. Also, remember to keep a tone (but not stiff) connection with your partner. A good connection is a must to feel the lead. I hope I adequately addressed your question, otherwise let me know.

I actually can follow very well, and I get complements on that all the time. However, what I believe is happening is that I look to my partner as if I'm not enjoying myself because I look tense and stiff. I just don't know how to let go and not worry about falling on my butt or following the steps correctly... Maybe this is something that no one can advice me, it just happens... not sure!

I am a competitive latin dancer and with years of experience-- I still dance sort of cool rather than with lots of expression. It is hard for me to smile or express much when competing due to thinking about everything I am doing. However, this past comp. I had a breakthrough and smiled or expressed myself a lot more--I just chose to express myself more on the floor. Now when I dance socially I force my self to smile and look like I am having a good time. It is like developing a good habit.

It helps if you dance with a fun partner that's not too hung up on technique and everything being perfect.
A partner that I dance with over thinks technique and it shows in our dancing.
She is a good dancer, but at times takes all the fun out of it. Choosing fun partners will help you smile or look relaxed.

At some point one needs to do some mind control and smile or look like you are having fun while dancing. Everyone can choose and develop his own dance personality. There is a certain amount of theater or acting used in all dances.