I started taking dance classes at a franchise studio earlier this year, and have been experiencing some problems with one of my teachers. I get the feeling he does not feel I live up to his standards, and that he is disgusted to have me as one of his students. He is repeatedly critical and disparaging of my dancing, and I find it difficult to take. He does not treat his other students in this manner. I feel that he thinks that I will reflect poorly upon him as a teacher, and make him look bad. I would feel uncomfortable to switch teachers at a small studio, and the next studio of this kind is an hour away and too far to commute. Any advice?

Have you tried talking to him about your perceptions of his teaching methods? And if that doesn't work, have you tried talking to the studio manager?

It could be that you are just ultra-sensitive. After all, you say twice that you "get the feeling" that he thinks you aren't living up to his standards. Well, ask him about it. Don't guess, ask and clear the air.

Who knows, it could be that you are actually showing more potential than some of his students and so he is pushing you harder.

Or it could be that you are a slower learner and need nurturing, and he really is being critical and disparaging. In that case it is quite possible that you and he would both be happier if you had a different teacher.

You won't know any of this for sure until you talk about it with someone who can actually do something about the situation.

Laura has givn you terrific advice.

If you do nothing it will only get worse.

A good teacher will respond positively and respect you.

If the response is negative then no matter how great a teacher the learning atmosphere will only get worse.

Why pay for abuse. (rhetorical)

OB

Dear Opera Bob,

I did speak with him, and he responded in a superficially polite manner(so as not to get in trouble with the studio director). It is still tense dancing with him and not enjoyable. I feel degraded and am getting no pleasure from dancing. I am wondering how to get my money back for the lessons remaining. It is a sticky situation because of course the studio wants to profit. This instructor is well thought of at the studio, and I am fairly sure they would take his word over mine.

Hi:

In the end you are still the customer... speak with the director of the studio and ask directly what you need to do to get a refund. They are going to ask you why and how to make your learning experience better. Make up an excuse if you only want to get your money back.

There are plenty of talented teachers out there, that have people skills, too. And there are still some of them out there that don't view us (the clients) as cash cows .

Don't give up dancing because of a bad dance instructor...

We did that once, because we just did not match up with the teachers style of teaching. Studio switched us to a different teacher, that we did work well with. Ex teacher was always friendly to us after that and us to him. Studio frequently contacted us after a teacher switch ( teachers left frequently ) to insure we were pleased with the new teacher.

I think the other advice is good. Either ask for a new teacher or ask for your money back - and expect that you will get what you ask for. You paid money (probably alot of it) for their professional service to be delivered in a professional manner. It is their responsibility to deliver satisfactory service or refund money.

I myself switched teachers within a studio. I was lucky that my first teacher was very nice and fun...But he was too nice! I wanted someone to tear me apart a little, because I want to be critiqued as much as possible. For me, that is what I am paying for. Basically I called and started making appointments with another teacher and it was as simple as that. Ballroom lessons are the most expensive of any of the partner dances I've taken, so I feel it is totally fair to expect the best teacher possible.