Have been taking Latin group class for two years.

In the group class, I have no problem with the class mate on timing or leading.

I broke up with a lady partner (5 year experience) just after three months of private lesson. Now I can not stand my new partner after another 3 months of private class.

Both of them have something in commom. They do not dance according to the teacher's steps, timing, and instruction. They dance according to their feeling of the music. Same routine with difference timing with difference song. End up I was the one to blame...

Any suggestion

"Both of them have something in commom. They do not dance according to the teacher's steps, timing, and instruction. They dance according to their feeling of the music. Same routine with difference timing with difference song. End up I was the one to blame..."

What happens when they dance with the teacher during your private lesson together?

Ultimately dancing should be in accordance with feeling of the music, and each individual song should make the dancing a little bit different. But usually it is necessary to learn to dance fairly strictly first, so that those unique and expressive variations make sense - most people's untrained expressive dancing is wildly off the mark. On the other hand, some trying to dance strictly over do that as well, to the point where they are not being rhythmic but simply robotic.

Get over yourself. If you were so great, you wouldn't be out of a dance partner and hunting another down. For that matter, if *I* were so great, I'd be a DanceNatural spokesdancer and competing at Blackpool, not a rural southern town in a pair of VeryFines.

Contrary to rigidified belief, dancing is NOT about structure. It's fundamentals are based ON structure and order, but "Ar, they be more like guidelines..."

Dancing to something so strictly set that *everything* is choreo isn't dancing. It's miming.

The worst dancers are the best complainers: The music's too uneven, the floor's too fast/slow, my partner's to blame for the cancellation of Seinfeld, etc... Bla, bla, bla, just shut up and DANCE already.

If people would spend more time DANCING instead of thinking, they'd be better dancers and wouldn't have to gripe so much- and wouldn't clog up MY LOD.

I appreciate your efforts in taking the study of dance seriously, but you also need to just relax. Unless you're the next Ben Ermis, you're over-worrying.

Which brings us back to- if you were... you wouldn't be here.

*end snarkasm*

To DivaGinger:

Your remarks were really out of line, I don't remember the poster stating that he was all that great, just asking for advice. Really poor taste on your part.

*yawn*

Next?

Learn the absolute Basic steps in whichever style you are dancing. Find a partner who is willing to do the same. Do that and your troubles will be over.You must be both of the same mind.

I think good partners are as hard to find as good lovers.

People's own personal preference and styles make dance. You have to see that even the best dancers fall in and out of love with each other's abilities and styles. Look at the chaos on the professional scene and how many change partners every year or close to that.

Take the lessons for you, not your partner. You don't lose the knowledge when you change partners. Just know that when the right person comes along you'll agree on how to dance most of the time and you can teach each other what you've learned when dancing with the wrong partnrs in the meantime.