I've been dancing about 2 1/2 years. I started with group lessons when our daughter got married and added private lessons about 3 months ago. My instructor suggested we participate in a mini-showcase. It will be during a break at a dance sponsored by our local Art Center. Obviously, our music is pre-recorded but there will be a Big Band playing that evening, so several 100 people, and some very good dancers, will be there.

I feel a bit over my head. As much as I love my new activity I've never really danced before. I know I can't perform as well as I'd like to in the time that's left, so how do I make my peace with that and just keep focusing on improving and doing the best I can? It's one thing to say, it's another to do it. My instructor's terrific, patient and supportive, but I think he's over-estimating my ability. We'll be doing a rumba at a bronze level with various figures like traveling cross; spiral, walk-around, underarm, pivot and chainee turns. Also a dip, leg crawl etc. I've gotten very positive comments from people who happened to see our practices, but they're not dancers. On the videos I can see my technique's suffered as I focus on the patterns. We're practicing about 5 hours per week the last few weeks and I've improved a lot, but I still flinch a bit when I see the videos. Any suggestions besides "don't be too hard on yourself"? It's 2:14 minutes long to Sting's Fields of Gold. Thanks.

The first time is the hardest but I don't think your instructor is over-estimating your abilities, rather he thinks you need to try a showcase to see how it feels. Not everyone wants to perform and if you decide it isn't for you, then don't be pressured to try again. You probably will make mistakes but everyone there will understand and most won't notice. Keep smiling, keep moving, and don't forget your arms. Focus on your instructor. See it as a victory if you make it through the routine without any major mistakes. 99.9% of the people in the world could never do what you are doing so be proud that you have the guts to get out there. Breathe, follow and enjoy!

Thank you so much LadyDance. I appreciate the support, Also, I found one of the best things to do when you feel this way is to talk to your instructor. Yes, it seems obvious, but I wasn't sure how to start the conversation. When I got to practice last night, he immediately asked how my foot was doing,the Morton's Neuroma was pretty bad at the last class. Then he asked if I was still enjoying myself. I gave a weak smile and then we talked. He re-assured me that I was doing fine and said all the things you're saying here.

Before I went to class, I was seriously considering pulling out as I didn't think there could be enough improvement in the next 10 days to make it worth doing. So his comments were the first steps to feeling more confident, then we discussed a few trouble spots. I then had my best practice to date as I was so much more relaxed.

I'll still be nervous, and know I could always do better, but things went so well, my anxiety level's back to being manageable. Unfortunately, my arm-styling is my weakest part, but I'm now working on some key movements. I start out by myself with cucarachas, swivels and rumba walks, as he's shadowing me. Talk about pressure! But then we're together and I'll focus on the connection and following.

I'm glad you're feeling better. I refuse to beat myself up or apologize for my dancing and neither should you. I started when I was 45 years old! Of course, I want to get better and work hard to achieve that but I'll never be great. I too, suffer from Morton's Neuroma which makes dancing in latin shoes very painful. Luckily, I can wear my orthotics in my standard shoes and the pain is minimal. The reason I mentioned your arms is because I did a performance (cha cha), I thought my arms were OK. When I saw the video, I saw that my hands were balled up and I was kind of chicken-winged. Next time, I went all out with the arms and actually got compliments. Let us know how it goes!

You've gotten some good advice. Remember, you're harder on yourself than others will be. And--mistakes or not--you can do what you're going to do better than nearly everybody else who will be there.

New topic: Morton's Neuroma. My wife/dance partner had Morton's Neuroma. She was apprehensive about the surgery because she heard that she might lose all feeling in that area. But she had the surgery, got relief, and the area DOES NOT feel numb. Don't suffer from the pain. Get it fixed. And good luck on your showcase.

Thanks for the good thoughts. My MN has been mild enough I can keep it under control. I stretch all day long and after dance put my feet in a very cold bathtub for about 15 minutes, it's better than icing them for me. I'm glad your wife's surgery went well. Sadly, I've heard from others, including my sister, who didn't have very good luck. One dancer told me "don't let them come near you with knife". That'll shake you up! I'm not too proud to dance socially with friends in my pink jazz shoes. As long as I can keep dancing. I'm hoping after the showcase, some rest will get me back to almost normal and I can start wearing my "pretty" shoes at length again.

Aw what the hey, I'll admit it-I started at 57 1/2. You do the math, I've been dancing for 2.5 years...But my father was a competitive tennis player into his late 80's. Wish me luck on the arms, they're pretty pathetic, but I'm really working at it. I'm crossing my fingers about the foot, I'm just afraid of crossing the line between a flare-up into chronic. I looked at orthotics, but I didn't think they'd fit any of my shoes and it's mild enough that stretching, icing and wearing the Bloch Jazz shoes for practice has helped immensely. I can wear my 1.5" Cuban heels for about 20 minutes before it acts up.

There was a big article in our paper about the event and my stomach got all jittery. But you're all right; how many people would even dream of doing this, let alone actually getting out there?

Ladydance is correct. Very few spectators will recognize any mistakes you might make if you keep your composure. Even if they do, so what! I can look at video of everything I've done and find things I could have done better.

I can look back on my first show and laugh at how poorly I executed the figures if I compare to what I can do today. My teacher used it to push me and it worked. Shortly after that I began to compete and if you haven't tried that, it may be worth taking a shot just once.

I think there is nothing better than working toward goals with deadlines to stimulate your own progress. Don't forget to get video of your performance, it can be a great learning tool. Dance your heart out and enjoy every second.

More good advice, thank you! Thank heavens for video and iPads, that's how I've been able to make the progress I have. As I mentioned earlier, I had a good talk with my instructor yesterday which helped tremendously. When I saw my first showcase this year the main thing I took away was I wanted to look relaxed, connected to my partner and enjoy myself. I'm hoping now I can do that and remember that's the most important thing. I can rely on muscle memory and my instructor to do that.

However, he did start to tell me that only three people would notice if I made a mistake. He began to say the names of his instructor, who's a former US Champion, and another colleague! I told him, in my mind they ARE not there and I don't want to hear any more! He laughed. Hey, I'll take any delusions I can to get me through this. Luckily, I don't know her that well to recognize her by sight.

I can't tell you enough how much reading these kind words helps. I'm not trying to do this perfectly, but as well as I can at this particular time. Now that I'm more relaxed and confident, I think it will be just fine.

IME, my first showcase was the hardest (and most poorly danced LOL) and they got progressively easier and better from there. I now compete am-am with my wife and dance the occasional showcase now as a stress reliever compared to comps.

Anyway, have fun, do your best and do remember that most people won't even know if you make a mistake as long as you don't let on.

Let us know how it goes.